Oh, what keeps me up at night!

It takes me several hours to fall asleep lately. Apparently, people think that I'm stressed out and my mind must be occupied with stressful things. However, I'm not stressed. My mind is just boggled with boring, random junk. Here is a sampling:

1. One night, I thought about P.D.Q Bach. If you were ever in band, you should know who P.D.Q. Bach is. It is band geek humor. I used to get a chuckle out of one of his songs that ended in five whole notes instead of the traditional two. Yep, hilarious as I'm sure you can see. We played a song that had members of the band gargle at one point. (What a nerd I was). Band geeks love him anyway. I'm thinking about getting one of his CD's but I'm turned off by the fact that they have a laugh track.

2. Another night, I thought about sex reassignment surgery. I don't want to change my sex, but I was wondering if it was covered by insurance. It isn't. Then I thought about if I owned a business would I want it covered? I would. I think that gender identity disorder is real and as of right now, the only treatment we really have is sex reassignment surgery. What really made up my mind on the subject was the book "As Nature Made Him" about a boy who had a botched circumcision and so they raised him as a girl. Well, that boy/girl developed gender identity disorder although s/he never knew that s/he was born a boy. Good book, well, if you like depressing, true stories.

So, I figured that if the insurance carrier didn't cover it, I would offer to pay for the surgery. Then I realized that I would then have every transsexual trying to work for me and then quit once the surgery was done. So, I would do a matching program. Same problem.

There was no solution, but then again, I don't own a company in which someone is trying to get insurance coverage for sex reassignment surgery. The thought just kept me up at night.

3. Another night, I thought about WYNN stock. I told my father to buy it at $14 and he said that casinos were too risky. It's now at $66 and had a high of $75. Too risky? I knew it would do well, at least to start, because owning a casino is like printing your own money. I wish I had enough money that I could have invested. If you invested $10,000 when at $14 and sold at $66 you would have over $47,000. I should totally be an investment banker.

4. Another night, I was haunted by an incident in my past. In high school, I had a humanities class where the teacher insisted that we bring in an art project made out of food. I came up with the idea of filling an egg with a syringe with red food coloring. Taking it to class, cracking it open, exposing the "blood" filled egg, and then declaring the name of the piece, "Abortion". Unfortunately, I'm pro-choice and I couldn't bring myself to do it. I couldn't think of a solution to the problem, so I simply didn't complete it and failed that assignment. I came up with a solution though as I was trying to fall asleep. I would simply change the title to "the Miracle of Birth". That only took 20 years to come up with, and people say I'm lazy. I'll take that "A" now, Ms. Hewlitt.

5. Another night, I lay in bed thinking about the Lakota Buffalo. You know, the white buffalo that the Lakota tribe believes will usher in a new age. It was born a while ago and I haven't heard anything about it. Apparently, nothing has happened. Here's the legend: http://www.kstrom.net/isk/arvol/buffpipe.html The owners refuse to sell the white buffalo and allow Native Americans to visit it. That's all I know.