OK, so I'm taking a free writing class online for fun (of course they are trying to sell you something). The lesson they had me do is take the three words: Fire, Clock, and Certainty and put them in a story, which you have to write in 5 minutes. The first word of one of the story had to be one of the words. Also, you weren't allowed to think while writing which is pretty much writing class 101. So, I did it and it created something that doesn't seem like me at all. Of course, they replied that it was outstanding, but not to take their word for it, but show it to my friends. I think it is crap and will not be offended if you think it is crap. I hope you think it is crap in fact, because I want to see how form lettery their response was. Shoot, I should have written pure crap and seen what they would have said. Here it is:
Fire welled up inside of him. He was so angry. His eyes bulged out as he
stared at the clock watching each precious second tick by. How could she be
so late? How could she be so inconsiderate? All right, it was only their
first date and only five minutes had passed, but tardiness is unforgivable.
That was a certainty in all aspects of lfe. He had never been late for
anything in his life. He was born on the day the doctors predicted and hit
puberty at 13 just like the health books in school said he should.
Now, he could not wait any longer. "This is ridiculous. Being stood up in
a coffee house," he muttered under his breath, getting up to leave. "I'm
not going to wait any longer." Just then, she entered wearing a light,
flowered, summery dress. She saw him and smiled, her hair glistened as a
breeze brushed through it.
"Sorry, I'm late." Her eyes sparkled under the art house lighting.
"I didn't even realize. I just got here myself," he replied as he pulled
out a chair for her.
Is this pure crap? It's not as interesting as the stuff you write about in your everyday life stories, I know that much. But does that make it poorly written? I am not secure enough as a critique-r to know. I would have guessed it was closer to 'well-written' then 'pure crap.'
ReplyDeleteOh wait. You wrote that in FIVE minutes??? Ok, well in that case, it is good and they arent just trying to sell you something.
At least, they arent having to lie to you in order to sell you something.
Damn. I really wish it was pure crap so I could laugh at them. Your critique isn't as kind as theirs and I appreciate that. I guess I can laugh at them a little. I guess it was a good exercise to put out something quickly that wasn't necessarily my style.
ReplyDeleteGlamorous yet relatable to by the common man
ReplyDeleteThe irony is that you dont even need their class.
I think you know how to write just fine as is. In fact, I am waiting for an autobiographical story from you with some strange angle as the selling point. Something dark but sweet with the air of wisdom being imparted from a guy who watches people come and go from the tables for a living.
Your job seems fraught with symbolism and anecdotes concerning the human condition, and you have the perfect 'voice' for drawing sympathy to characters that might otherwise seem depressing or trivial. Although, maybe you shouldnt take my word for that. I would feel really bad if you wrote a whole book, and I was the only one who liked it. I know I would like it though.
Ah So!
ReplyDeleteI see. Well, hellfire, then you'll get plenty of good practice in taking a class like that. So, it's more like a focusing tool than a 'how to' program for you.
I think I will save up my illusions about your job, and spin a short tale about it next time someone asks me to make something up for amusement around the campfire. I am beginning to suspect that being a casino dealer is not really all I imagine. Maybe, like how 'being a private eye' isnt all voiceovers and dames with a beef.
Yup, it's pure crap. I'm currently taking a creative writing class, as you know, and so I'm in critique mode and this, my dear, is crap! ;)
ReplyDeleteWe have been given assignments similar to this that has made me surprised at what I produced as well.
Thank you...I think it just is horrible and at best some romance novel start. Yuck!!
ReplyDeleteWhen you had an assignment, did you produce crap or something good in your own opinion? My problem is that I can't tell if something I wrote is any good.
well, when we had this assignment we were suppossed to use the first two words that came to mind. This was our only limitation. The two words i used were hermaphadite and atmosphere. I liked what i produced and actually took that and built upon it to write "I am..." that you read.
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel and I'm sure it's frustrating to take a class where they only give you positive feedback, i would be weary of their opinions too. Luckily in my class I know it's truthful critisism as we are all present and I know they are all my peers.
However, i have also noticed that in our workshopping assignments that we have been doing, so many opinions and views come up about the same piece. Some people will get a meaning that another will not (the writter cannot speak so we never know what was intended) so it all comes down to your reader. The same piece that i may love another will hate.
In your're situation though i would'nt worry too much because I already know that you are a GREAT writter. This assignment, i think, was a suicide mission due to the limitations put upon you.
check out www.constrained.org for other writing exercises.
ReplyDeleteThose aren't writing exercises....those are writing tortures. Eeeek!
ReplyDeletecheck out www.constrained.org for other writing exercises.
ReplyDeletewell, when we had this assignment we were suppossed to use the first two words that came to mind. This was our only limitation. The two words i used were hermaphadite and atmosphere. I liked what i produced and actually took that and built upon it to write "I am..." that you read.
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel and I'm sure it's frustrating to take a class where they only give you positive feedback, i would be weary of their opinions too. Luckily in my class I know it's truthful critisism as we are all present and I know they are all my peers.
However, i have also noticed that in our workshopping assignments that we have been doing, so many opinions and views come up about the same piece. Some people will get a meaning that another will not (the writter cannot speak so we never know what was intended) so it all comes down to your reader. The same piece that i may love another will hate.
In your're situation though i would'nt worry too much because I already know that you are a GREAT writter. This assignment, i think, was a suicide mission due to the limitations put upon you.